Is Online Dating Worth It? 15+ Tips and Rules for Single Men

Online dating isn’t the most surefire way to find a significant other, but it’s convenient and allows people to explore more options. However, this type of dating environment seems to be more beneficial for women than for men. Many guys might prefer trying dating apps before meeting in person, but is online dating worth it? What can single guys do to improve their chances of meeting the right person? This online dating advice will help you navigate the cold, unforgiving world of online dating.

How Many People Use Online Dating?

While dating apps had their heyday a few years ago, plenty of people still use them. Thirty percent of U.S. adults say they’ve used a dating app or site. The most significant age group was those under 30, with 53% saying they had tried online dating. However, you’re still in luck if you’re over 30 — 57% of adults aged 30–64 have used dating apps.

Additionally, you could be more likely to find a match if you aren’t straight. Just under 30% of straight people said they used a dating app, but 51% of people who identify as gay or bisexual have dated online. Pew Research Center published this data in February of 2023, so those looking to get out there can still find connections on dating apps and sites.

Online Dating Advice for Single Men: 10 Easy Tips

1. Take Better Photos

First impressions have always mattered in dating, and now more than ever. Whichever dating app or website you use, your profile’s photos will make or break your chances 99% of the time. If you have a blurry selfie and random pictures from several years ago, you’ll never get a match. 

Here are some types of photos that many guys think are impressive, but are actually major turn-offs for women:

• Partying
• Gaming
• Watching sports
• Alcohol or drug use

It should come as no surprise that women don’t want partners who spend all their time partying, gaming, drinking and obsessing over sports. Millions of men have this exact lifestyle. You will never be able to stand out from your competition with these photos.

These are the qualities that women tend to look for in men’s pictures:

• High definition
• Smiling
• Good posture
• Self-care habits
• Fashion sense
• Variety of locations
• Interesting hobbies

Men are visual creatures. A bikini photo and a good smile will capture their attention without failure. Women are more complicated. They need social proof that a man is a viable partner. Your photo selection is your first opportunity to demonstrate that you’re a hygienic, intelligent, capable person.

2. Expand Your Match Radius

Many online dating platforms allow users to set a match radius to find people close to home. You might think it’s a good idea to set your match radius at 10 miles, but this range sets you up for failure. How many attractive single women do you think are within 10 miles of your location? Why limit yourself to such a small dating pool? 

A 25 or 30 mile radius is small enough for practical purposes, but large enough to multiply your options. It prevents you from encountering the same handful of people on dating sites again and again. Additionally, dating someone from the next town over helps establish boundaries in the early stages. It also makes casual hook-ups more difficult – a win-win for both parties.

3. Text Like an Adult

If you’re an adult man who still texts like a teenager, you’ll never get a decent match. You might attract women who don’t care about communication skills and are just looking for hook-ups, but you won’t get any keepers. Stop using emojis and abbreviations in every message. Communicate like an adult to display your confidence and intelligence. 

Contrary to what other online dating advice sources might tell you, pick-up lines are terrible ideas. Single women have heard them all. You’re not going to impress her by taking the same approach as dozens of guys before. A clever and straightforward introduction with clear intent for meaningful conversation is the best way to earn a woman’s response.

4. Set Firm Boundaries

If you find a potential partner, it’s important to set firm boundaries with them. You barely know each other, so you don’t have to text 24/7. Your other life responsibilities are still more important. Don’t be afraid to end the conversation, but NEVER leave her on read. This creates a sense of uncertainty that will eventually drive her away.

You also can’t expect the woman to lead the conversation all the time. They might be more naturally social, but they still expect potential partners to carry their weight. There must be equal effort from both sides in the courting stage for a successful relationship to develop.

5. Arrange a First Date Fast

The spark between potential partners can only last so long in an online setting. You need to arrange a first date fast before she loses interest. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy. In fact, something simple in a low-stress environment like a coffee or lunch date is perfect for your first meeting. This piece of online dating advice is especially crucial for marriage-minded people.

It’s also worth noting that attractive women have options. You can be sure that a few other guys are trying to get her attention. f you drag your feet and fail to advance to the next stage, you’ll quickly fall out of her favor. You must take the initiative and make her see you as a serious candidate.

6. Dress Well for First Dates

Even if you don’t think much about what you wear every day, your date will look at your clothes and form an initial impression. It’s important to wear nice clothes for every date to demonstrate respect for their time.

Dressing well means avoiding commonly worn clothing that’s more casual, like:

• Graphic tees
• Sneakers
• Sweatshirts

A simple button-down and a pair of slacks will look perfect for more casual first dates. You can always dress your clothes up even more if you’re meeting at a fancy restaurant or another venue.

7. Don’t Let Lust Cloud Your Judgment

Online dating exposes men to lots of attractive women. With that being said, you mustn’t let lust cloud your judgment. Don’t swipe right and try to message every decent-looking woman you see. If sex is at the front of you mind, you will never find a high-value partner. Her personality and long-term goals are much more important.

8. Showcase Your Independence

No one wants to date someone who acts like a child. Your future partner wants to fall in love, not become your parent. Use your profile pictures to showcase your independence, like showing how you meal prep or take care of a garden. Your future dates will never worry that you’re immature or looking for something less serious due to your age.

9. Ask Your Date About Themselves

People love to talk about themselves. It’s especially important to do that while chatting over dating apps or websites. Words are all you have to know each other without in-person body language or vibes. Ask your potential partner interesting conversational questions about their lives, like what they do for a living, what their favorite hobbies are or what they dream about for their future.

Women almost always know when men are trying to hook up. You can’t fool them, so don’t bother trying. Focus on developing an emotional connection with her instead of ogling over her physical attributes.

10. Accept Them as They Are

Monitor how you think about someone as you get to know them over dating apps or websites. Don’t go on a date if you’re thinking about how you can change the person or adjust certain aspects of their personality. It’s tempting to meet people just to see them apart from their profile, but they shouldn’t be your next project.

4 Online Dating Rules Everyone Should Know

Jumping into the dating world is always intimidating, but it’s especially scary if you’re not used to the online scene. Here a few online dating rules everyone should know before they start reaching out to potential matches. You’ll feel confident about meeting new people and finding your next date more easily.

1. No Creepy Pick-Up Lines

You’ll need something to say when introducing yourself to a new match, but there are many bad options out there. Imagine yourself in your potential date’s shoes. Would you feel flattered or interested if you read lousy pick-up lines like:

• Here I am. What are your other two wishes?
• You look like you’re busy, but could you still add me to your to-do list?
• I love that shirt in your profile picture. It’d look better on the floor.

You’d never say things like this to a stranger in the grocery store, so they’re not acceptable on a dating app or website.

2. Dates Should Be Public

If someone asked you to meet them for the first time in their home, you’d be a little creeped out. Always suggest a public venue or a place with plenty of people for your first, second and even third date. You could head to a restaurant or host an outdoor game night with friends if you’d prefer to hang out at your place. 

3. No Oversharing

Oversharing is always a red flag when you’re online dating. The other person could be trauma dumping on you or vice versa. You’ll also come across as self-absorbed, so watch for oversharing on your part or from your date.

4. Be Honest About Your Intentions

Your dating profile will mention what you’re looking for in a person within your bio, but it’s also essential to bring up your priorities in conversation. Whether you’re instant messaging or video chatting, you should mention what you’re looking for between your initial contact and the first few dates. Your relationship will be much healthier if you both align on things like your religious beliefs and political opinions.

Once the conversation begins, you must make your priorities clear. Tell her what you’re looking for in a relationship. Are you dating just for fun, or are you dating for marriage? This straightforward approach forces both parties to be objective about the situation. If your priorities don’t align, then you can go your separate ways without unnecessary heartbreak.

Many men think online dating is a waste of time simply because they never take it seriously. They don’t have an end-goal in mind, which leaves them unsatisfied with their matches and sets them up for failure. Stop wasting your time and be honest about your intentions. Online dating advice sometimes requires the harsh truth.

Why Do You Want to Use a Dating App?

One of the biggest things to ask yourself is why you want to get back out there in the first place. If you’ve just gotten out of a relationship and are already looking for a new partner, it’s probably worth pumping the brakes. You must take time to heal and learn how to be alone before venturing back into the world of love. If you don’t, you risk bringing trauma you don’t know how to cope with into the new relationship. Relying on others to fix you is never a good plan.

Additionally, avoid joining the dating scene just because people tell you you should. You may be too young, not feel ready or not identify as someone who feels romantic attraction. All these reasons are perfectly valid explanations for not doing online dating and you shouldn’t let anyone pressure you into doing so. You’ll avoid misunderstandings or potentially dangerous situations by not dating until you’re ready or staying true to yourself.

3 Signs You’re Ready to Get Out There

Think you’re ready to look for love via the internet? Here are three signs you’re ready to hit the online dating scene.

1. You’re Not Still Hung up on Your Last Relationship

Plenty of people try dating on an app or site because they want to try something new — and that’s perfectly OK. But if you’re trying to shake things up because you’re still mourning your last relationship, take more time for yourself rather than jumping into a new one. Someone new won’t fix you — you must do that yourself. Once you’ve fully distanced yourself from the past, you’re ready to start looking for online love.

2. You Feel Whole All by Yourself

It’s a popular romantic idea that your partner is your missing puzzle piece, they complete you, they make you whole and so on. While you might think that’s a cute notion, it’s really not ideal for a relationship. What happens if they have an untimely death? What happens if they end things after you’ve completely tied yourself to them? It will make the coping process so much harder. Also, you might become more paranoid about them leaving you, leading to unhealthy behaviors.

Healthy boundaries are some of the essentials of a long-lasting relationship. You’ll only learn your limits and needs by spending time alone. Once you feel like a whole person all by yourself, you’re ready to start bringing someone into your world.

3. You’re Ready to Take Responsibility

Nobody’s perfect — not you, the person you’ll date, your parents or even their parents. Everybody has flaws and things they must take accountability for. You might engage in some behaviors by yourself or with your friends that a new partner finds upsetting or creepy. For example, are you typically a responsible drinker but tend to get blackout drunk at parties? Do you laugh along with your buddies as they critique the looks of every girl at the bar?

Whether you think those behaviors are OK or they’re the result of peer pressure, they can be very off-putting to others. Are you ready to recognize you likely have some things to fix? Are you willing to change your unsavory habits to improve yourself? If you take offense to everything your partner brings up, you’re likely not ready to be in a relationship.

A word of caution — honesty and criticism can turn toxic. Someone telling you to clean up after yourself, you’re mean when you’re drunk or your jokes are more hurtful than funny is not abuse. However, if your partner belittles you or makes you feel less than without apologizing, that could be verbal abuse. If something like this happens, talk to them and gauge how they react. Defensiveness, deflection, blame and anger when you bring up something that hurt you are significant red flags.

Make This Online Dating Advice Work for You

Online dating isn’t a one-way ticket to a successful relationship. If you treat it as such, you’ll never find the person you’re looking for. Make online dating work for you by cleaning up your profile, communicating like an adult and being clear about your intentions. Women like confidence and competence. You must show these qualities every step of the way.

Originally published 1/13/2023 – Updated 4/23/2025